Extraction

I was unable to get to sleep last night due to a toothache, literally every time I tried to lie down, I will be able to feel some kind of pressure slowly build up on my molar and if I were to use my tongue to slightly press that molar, I would get this dull ache that slowly crescendos into an unbearable soreness, which would jolt me right up and make me pace around the room as I attempt to alleviate it.

 I was planning to visit my dentist next week because that was his earliest availability but the pain on the second night made me realize I wasn't going to be able to wait that long because the discomfort on the first night was nothing compared to the discomfort on the second night, if I waited a whole week, I am not sure what state of pain I would be in.

I was seriously contemplating to go to an emergency dental clinic just to get a root canal and rid myself off the pain and I managed to find one dentist online who claims to offer a 24 hours service, but every attempt at trying to reach him did not actually work. I called him and the phone didn't ring more than 3 times before it was rejected, I tried to reach out via the Online chat and there was no response, so I Whatsapp the number at 2.30am, hoping to get a response, but there wasn't any,

It was a very long, tiring and painful night, I was trying to keep myself entertained by watching Youtube videos, but after a while, the tiredness just takes over, so I will try and find a position to sleep upright, but being someone who can't actually fall asleep unless I am lying down completely flat, I would find myself slowly lying down as flat as I could until I  was comfortable enough, but that would cause the pressure to start building up and I find myself jolted awake by the pain that slowly builds up until it gets really unbearable and start pacing around the room again. This happened for at least half a dozen times.

At about 5.30am, I finally get a response from the 24 hour dentist asking me what issues I was having, so I replied and told him that I was having a really bad toothache and might need to do a root canal if absolutely necessary. To be honest, at this stage, I already knew the root canal is inevitable because I had a similar experience before a few years ago when my front tooth had that build up pressure, only difference is that front tooth had an abscess and this molar one didn't, but doing the Root Canal offered instantaneous relief and I really wanted that relief.

The dentist then went ahead to schedule a 10am appointment for me and I just wanted time to pass  faster so I can get rid of the pain and actually get some sleep.

I know I wasn't going to be able to function properly at work today, so I requested for half day off, not a full day off because I had to be there to oversee a few order transfers, and my goal was to leave right after the transfers were done.

So 10am comes along and I am finally at the dentist, compared to the other clinics I have visited before, this one felt different, it felt almost homey and the receptionist was extremely friendly, so I immediately felt comfortable. We took my X-Ray immediately after I was done filling up the Personal Information Form and about 5 to 10 minutes later, I got ushered to see the dentist on the second floor.

The dentist was looking at my X-Ray as I made my way up and it felt like he wasn't sure what he was looking at, so after we greeted one another, I explained to him what was happening and the history behind the tooth that was giving me so much issue.

History Time.

The very first time this molar started giving me an issue was during my company trip to Malaysia back when I was still with ID4 in 2019, I was suddenly awoken at night with a really really bad toothache, it's the type of soreness that comes after I would tighten my braces, except I was already done with my braces so there shouldn't be any sore. 

I visited the dentist a total of 4 times after that just to get the issue fixed, and we did the regular drilling away of the decay and patching up the hole that was left from it, and it did get better, but sadly, they were all temporary solutions to a permanent problem, because this molar would consistently act up every few months following the initial patch work.

 

The patch work would last for about a year or two before it finally broke off and that was when I found myself visiting the dentist again to try and rectify the molar, this time, the dentist recommended an extraction, but offered alternate solutions which included doing a crown to cover the molar or a root canal, but he was not very confident about the root canal because my molar didn't have a lot of it's original structure left, it was about 70% filling and doing a root canal may potentially cause my entire tooth to just shatter during the procedure, so he recommended I do a crown instead because from the X-Ray, it didn't look like the nerves were being affected by the decay, it was extremely close but he was confident that if we did a crown, we can protect the tooth from further decay, so I agreed to it and ended up forking about $1200 for a zirconium crown, the best and most expensive material for crowning that according to the dentist, will be able to last for a very long time, and it did for a while. This was back when I was still doing ID, so my salary was not stable and shelling out $1200 was a really big deal for me, but I was willing to spend that money if it meant I didn't have to extract anything.

Over the next few months however, I would start getting tooth sensitivity issues on that molar. whenever I drank cold drinks or eat cold foot and swish the beverage towards the left side of my mouth, which is where the problematic molar was, I would get this jolt of pain, so after a while, I just stopped chewing with my left side and only chewed with my right side.

The last time I went back to the dentist for the sensitivity issue was back in January this year, I was having this sudden throbbing pain at work for the entire day that wouldn't go away, but for some reason, it stopped the next day when I was at the dentist, the dentist couldn't find any issue when he looked at the X-Ray and told me it was probably nothing to be worried about, and because I was fine after that, I decided to take his word for it and did nothing. A part of me just wanted to believe everything was fine and that this random sensitivity issue was just going to be a small issue that would always come and go. 

Little did I know, the reason why the pain stopped is because the tooth had died.

This was what the dentist I visited this morning told me after he looked at my X-Ray and he told me that the situation was really really bad, and that it wasn't just my molar that was having the issue, but the tooth right beside was also showing signs of very very bad damage. He did a cold test on the tooth beside my molar and lo and behold, the cold was so sharp my whole body actually jolted on the chair. The receptionist, who was also the dental assistant was super nice and keep rubbing my shoulders to comfort me, she really helped the whole process feel less daunting and then when the test were done, the dentist told me the 1 thing I was hoping we wouldn't have to do...

"I would recommend for you to extract both teeth." 

... I am someone who is extremely self-conscious about my teeth because they were never aligned before I did my braces, for as long as I remembered, I was always very worried about people looking at my teeth, so I would always smile with my mouth closed and when I laugh, I always make sure to cover my mouth with my hand,  and it was only after I did my braces did I feel confident showing my teeth when I am smiling and laughing. 

I really didn't want my teeth to go back to how they were back 10 years ago because it was really really really misaligned and my biggest concern about extracting two teeth is how it could potentially cause the teeth to start shifting around.

Tooth extraction wasn't something I wanted to do, so I asked him what about a root canal, he told me he could do it as well, but it wouldn't really solve the issue because both my teeth were already badly damaged by decay, even if he were to do the root canal successfully, it wouldn't guarantee that the decay won't come back again, and if it does come back, the teeth will be even weaker than before due to the root canal treatment and I might face more issues down the road.

I really contemplated about what to do for a while and after really thinking about his advise, decided to go for the extraction because what the dentist said was true, the teeth are already severely damaged, the fact that I have been having tooth sensitivity issues for the past few years and having to constantly go back to a dentist and have the same tooth checked is a clear indication that it needs to go. I have wasted so much time and money trying to salvage something that is already beyond repair, extraction would be doing me and my 2 teeth a favor. That being said, it was a very painful decision because not only would I be losing 2 teeth, I will also be throwing the super expensive zirconium crown away.

The dentist starts prepping me for the extraction by numbing my mouth and I always felt like extraction was a much scarier procedure than a root canal, didn't really know why I felt that way but I did, and then as the dentist was trying to extract my tooth out did I realize why it was scarier.

Even though there isn't any pain, there is a massive amount of pressure when it comes to tooth extraction and this isn't something I would know despite having all 4 of my wisdom teeth extracted because I was a pussy then and opted to be placed under general anesthesia. 

The dentist was struggling to yank both my tooth out because of how long the roots were and because my tooth is short at the top, he couldn't find a proper grip and had to keep switching between the different pliers. The amount of pressure I felt was extremely concerning because even though I know the teeth are bad, it just feels weird to be extracting teeth that aren't shaky. The dental assistant had to hold my head while the dentist was slowly but firmly jiggling the tooth out from their socket, it felt like it was going on for way too long and I started questioning if I had gone to the correct dentist since I had only managed to find this dentist out of desperation a few hours ago on the internet, I had a lot of thoughts running through my head. 

But after what felt like eons, both tooth were finally extracted successfully...

... one of them is black on the inside because of the cement that was used to stick the crown on it, but that's how bad the tooth was, I feel like I was euthanizing the tooth during the extraction because it was clearly barely hanging on, and that little chicken leg looking part of the tooth, that is pulpitis and that was what was causing the pain. I don't really know how big a normal pulp is suppose to look, but seeing that lump at the end of my molar was very concerning and it just further justified my decision to do the extraction. The other tooth on the other hand is also in equally bad shape, it's not black on the inside but there were a lot of cracks, which was probably what caused all the sensitivity issue.

I requested to have the teeth but the dentist didn't really want to give them to me because it was not sanitary, he only allowed me to take some pictures, which I didn't take a good picture of, but the roots of my tooth were curved, that's why the extraction was a lot harder. As I have said before, my teeth used to be extremely misaligned so when I did my braces, a lot of shifting was involved and that shifting affected the way the roots of my tooth grew.

I now have 2 huge gap in my mouth, it feels weird, I am not sure if I am going to swell up from the extraction tomorrow because there was really a lot of pressure in the extraction. 

Anyways, the most painful part came towards the end of the procedure when I was given the bill, it came up to a whopping $3,200! That is more than a month's salary, sigh. I suddenly feel lucky that I am actually earning a stable income now because if I was still working at ID4, that $3,200 is going to be a huge damage to my savings. 

A huge bulk of the cost came from the bone grafting that had to be done in preparation for dental implants about a year later, the grafting for both tooth caused $2000, however I am not sure if I will actually go ahead with doing an implant because each implant is going to cost $5000, and I am not ready to shell out $10,000 for two unless I somehow become insanely successful over the next year.

I could've gotten tickets to New York with that money, and I am suddenly missing New York again despite the trip being almost 3 years ago. It would have sucked if I actually got that toothache whilst I  was in New York, would've completely ruined the trip.

A photo of my $1200 zirconium crown. This cost almost as much as my Samsung Z Flip 3. And today's procedure cost as much as me buying a Z Flip 3 and a Galaxy S22 Ultra, the good news is I am going to be getting my commission from my last projects at ID4 this month, so at least my savings will recuperate the losses I had to incur today and if this painful experience has taught me anything, it is that I had need to be grateful for having a job with a stable monthly salary.

Job Interview again.

So I had another job interview set up today and to be honest, it wasn't really an interview I had planned to take very seriously.

Even though I don't enjoy my current job, the stable salary is something I am still not prepared to give up, so I went to the interview today only to listen to what Interior Design companies are offering in terms of commission. The company itself is definitely a company I wouldn't mind working for because they have a very similar design language as me and if the offer was enticing enough, I would consider quitting my current company to join this one.

So the interview was done by the director and my first impression of her was that I didn't like her, it's nothing that she did, but just her general mannerism that rubbed me the wrong way because she just didn't come across as a very friendly and approachable individual. 

When she started talking about the job, she was sharing with me how the company works, what I am expected to do as a designer in their company and I just felt really stifled by the SOP the company had in place, seeing how I had quite a bit of freedom with the way I did things at ID4, I then expressed my thoughts with her company's SOP and told her it felt a bit rigid. I am not sure if she took offense to how I expressed my thoughts but she reiterated that "it isn't rigid to have those SOPs" in place and that was when I decided I didn't want to work under her. 

She is constantly disagreeing with me, when I ask if I could do my own 3D renderings since I have experience doing that, she says no, when I ask if I can use my own sub-cons, she says no, she doesn't even entertain the thought first and just says no to everything. The other ID firms that I have interviewed for would always be open to my style of working, when I ask other ID firms if I can do my own 3D, they will tell me to go ahead as long as it looks similar to what their own 3D Drafters prepare and when I ask if I can use my own sub-con, they would encourage me to introduce them to the company. 

And as if her rigidness isn't bad enough, the commission scheme is worst.

When I was working in ID4, the commission scheme was a 40/60 split, this meant I would get 40% of the profits whilst the company gets 60%.

So just to break down how that would work.

Let's say I managed to clinch a $11,000 project,

Project Cost - $10,000

Total Profit  - $1,000 (10% Profit)

The total project is then split between me and the company, so I get $400 and the company gets $600 base on the 40/60 arrangement.

This new ID firm on the other hand has a 45/55 split, which means I would get 45% of the project whilst the company gets 55% of the project, it sounds better, but there is this additional requirement that states the company will always be taking a commission worth 10% off the project cost regardless of how much the total commission is.

This means that if I were to clinch an $11,000 project.

Project Cost - $10,000

Total Profit - $1,000 (10% Profit)

I don't get any commission because that 10% will be taken by the company as their share.

Let's say a project that I have has a cost price of $30,000. this means the company would automatically pocket $3000 worth of commissions even before the project starts. If I charged the customer $32,000 for the whole project, and I only end up having $2000 worth of profit, I don't get share of that $2000, in fact, I would end up owing the company $1000 because of their commission scheme. 

Out of all the ID companies I have interviewed at, this honestly is one of the worst project sharing scheme I have heard of because you will get punished by the company if your profit margin is below a certain percentage. I guess my search for the next ID firm to join continues!

Not a good VM

Had to go to work today on Hari Raya and this isn't the first time I have had to work during a holiday, but for some reason, being at work today just felt really shitty.

I guess a bit of it had to do with the fact that one of my colleague had indirectly told me that I was not doing a good job as the VM of the store because I wasn't allowing her to sell our Showroom furniture. She was ranting to me about her lack of sales the past few months but her rant somehow ended up targeting me because me not allowing her to sell showroom pieces is apparently a reflection of my capabilities as a VM. 

She has this extremely selfish mentality and the reason I told her why I couldn't let her sell the pieces we have on the Showroom floor is because we do not have similar pieces in the Warehouse to replace those in the store. But she doesn't get it.

When I think of the Showroom in the store, I think of this...

...every piece of furniture in each setting is specially selected to compliment each other, if you sell one piece, you are going to ruin the entire setting. So if you want to sell that sofa, you don't tell me...

.. we have this yellow sofa in the Warehouse that we can use to replace the Showroom sofa. It doesn't match, the size is wrong, the color is wrong, the design is wrong. 

I honestly thinks that the vision she has for the store's Showroom is something like this...

...she has that "whatever we can bring in, we should bring in" mentality because all she wants to do is sell as much pieces as possible so she can get her commission.

She is from the older batch of sales people that still enjoys the commission scheme and the truth is, not a lot of people in the store have a lot of respect for her despite her seniority in the company because she is quite a selfish individual and this was not something I took notice of until I became the store's VM and have to deal with her constant...

"Can I sell this" despite already telling her it cannot be sold" 

...messages, and when I tell her she cannot sell those items because we want it to be displayed, she will complaint to me about her lack of sales and then take that opportunity to tell me that the VM isn't doing a good job.

She is very aware that I am the VM, she just doesn't use the pronoun "you" when expressing her dissatisfaction about me as the VM of the store. 

The reason she thinks the VM isn't a good job is because it's the VM's job to be flexible enough to make the furniture pieces work together if something gets sold off the floor. 

If she wants to sell the 2 seater sofa in the living room setting and all I have left in the Warehouse is a 15 meter Dining Table, it's my job to make that 15 meter dining table work in the living room setting because I am the VM.

Annoying.

Also, I really want to quit and return to Interior Design again because this job is starting to feel very meaningless. I thought becoming the store's VM would change that, but it hasn't, especially when I have to deal with people like her who only thinks about things from her own point of view.

Offered to be VM

So Stacked Homes recently wrote this awesome article that delve into the Renovation Industry from a Interior Designer's perspective and what was written in the article resonated with a lot of Interior Designers, even myself, because it's not very common to get articles like this, usually when renovation nightmares are brought up, it's always from the perspective of the homeowners.

Based on my personal experience while working at ID4, whilst there are irresponsible and unscrupulous Interior Designers that exist in the market, if you are engaging someone from a big design firm with hundreds of positive reviews and somehow still manage to have a negative enough experience that would warrant you to leave a bad review, chances are you are the problem.

If you are getting scammed by an Interior Designer however, then I honestly have no sympathy for you, the only reason you would get scammed is because you decided to go for the cheapest quote without doing any research on the Interior Designers and the company. I have met my fair share of homeowners who wants everything cheap, they don't value your effort and thinks that everything an Interior Designer quotes them should be the same as what a contractor quotes them because who needs to earn a decent commission, we Interior Designers just really love eating grass right?

If you have don't think Interior Designers deserve to earn their fair share of commission from upselling you on the various sub-cons services because that's literally how we earn money, if you think the work that we put into preparing design proposals and managing your project means nothing, well then, have a taste of your own medicine, let all the money you have earned and saved from working for years be robbed away from you by somebody who shares the same sentiment as you. 

Anyways, update on life so far.

I have officially rescinded my job acceptance last week after a week of contemplating and my belief is if it's meant to be, I will really be excited to jump on the opportunity to accept the job offer, and if I am really unsure about a new job, then it probably isn't the right one for me.

After turning down the job offer, I was finally offered to take over as the store's Visual Merchandiser, not the In-House Stylist, this means I won't have to help the Sales team with their design proposals like what the current In-House Stylist is doing, I am only taking up a portion of his job scope, I guess the boss still wants me to do Sales as well, but I am trying to find solace in the fact that my job will no longer be focused on just sales anymore because I have been spending the last few months feeling this great sense of inadequacy at my job. 

My Sales for the month of March is still at $0 because I have been spending pretty much the last few weeks of February prepping the Design Proposal for the job interview, so I wasn't able to get any proper walk-in leads in the store to follow up for March, and also the fact that I had planned to quit so there really wasn't any motivation for me to chase any sales.

If the In-House Interior Stylist hadn't submitted his resignation letter, I would have definitely thrown mine in because I am just really tired of dealing with retail customers.

I decided to stay mainly also because I felt bad leaving the store without any Interior Stylist onboard, everyone else aside from me and the In-House Stylist are purely sales, they have no formal background  and experience when it comes to Interior Design, and my boss hasn't done anything bad that would make me feel glee from quitting and leaving the company in the lurch, that being said, this mentality isn't good because I am ultimately still a replaceable asset in the company and staying for the wrong reasons would only be detrimental to me.

Job Offer

I have decided to accept the job offer 2 days ago, it wasn't a decision that I am very certain of because I was constantly going back and forth on the idea. I told the boss that I needed some time to think and to give me until the end of the month to decide and he did, so on the last day of February, I pretty much spend the entire day at work just weighing out my options.

It was not easy, for a few minutes, I would weigh out all of the positives of joining the new ID firm and when I am certain of my decision, all the positives of staying at my current job starts flooding in as well and I start to question everything all over again.

So just to weigh out the pros and both jobs.

-New ID Firm Pros

• I get to do Interior Design again and be in a creative role once again. 

• The company offers commission on top of basic, so there is the option of earning more than what I am currently earning every month.

• The job scope is what I have been looking for in an Interior Design role, which is to just do the Design and not be required to Project Manage the site.

• Will be able to improve on my Design language

-New ID Firm Cons

• Quarterly Sales Target that needs to be hit, otherwise I will get terminated

• Lower Basic so I could also potentially earn less than what I am earning now every month

• Not so sure about the Bosses as I don't think we really click very well during the interview

-Current Company Pros

• Stable Salary

• Familiar Environment

• Generally stress-free

• Nice Boss

- Current Company Cons

• Job scope isn't what I wanted to do

• No discernable career progression

I know from a Career point of view, joining the ID Firm is the path to take, but from a stability point of view, staying with my current is the way to go, there is no right and wrong, it's simply a matter of what is important to me at this stage of my life and the honest truth is I just simply do not know. 

When I send the message to officially accept the offer that night, I felt relieve, not because I knew I had made the right decision, but because a decision was finally made. I requested for additional time for my notice period and the boss messages me back the next morning to ask if it meant I were to start in mid April instead of the start of April, and then ask me for my IC so he can prepare a contract agreement for me. 

I responded to his first message and told him that I would like to start in mid April if that was possible, and then send my IC over, this was yesterday morning, I haven't gotten any updates from him since.

So I went to work yesterday and my supervisor, being aware of my job offer, ask me if I had accepted the offer already, I told him I did and he tells me that our In-House Interior Stylist has also accepted a new job offer and will be submitting his 1 month notice the next day, which is today.

I knew the In-House Interior Stylist had plans to leave the company, maybe within the year, I just didn't realize it was going to be this soon.

This changes everything.

If the In-House Interior Stylist leaves, his position would remain open, that means I could potentially be asked to fill in his position and actually be doing the job I had originally applied for! My supervisor tells me that if I choose to stay, he will talk to the boss to ensure that I be given the In-House position.

At this point, I am also not sure if the ID Firm is even interested to hire me anymore because it has been more than 24 hours since my last contact with their boss, my last exchange was the request to have my notice period be extended to mid April, a request he didn't actually respond to.

New Job Again?

Went for a job interview about 2 weeks ago for an Interior Design position and during the interview, I was able to learn more about the job.

Unlike the regular Interior Design firms that have now saturated the market, this company has very clear job positions in their company, if you are an Interior Designer, all you have to do is design, and if you are a Project Manager , then you just have to Project Manage. Majority of the ID firms in the market would usually require the ID to do both the Interior Designing as well as the Project Management and I have never enjoyed the latter because that is usually where a bulk of my anxiety originates from.

So anyways, I spoke to the boss of the company and first of all, he was 30 minutes late for the interview, so the first impression I had of him wasn't great, then the interview starts and he starts talking about his company and asks me about my skill set and experience, after which, he asked me if I had some time because he wanted to show me a 20 minute video, so I told him I did, but I was not expecting the video to actually be 25 minutes long , I thought he said 20 minutes as a figure of speech, I thought it was going to just be a quick 10 minute video and that was it, but it had the same running time as an episode of Attack on Titan, like it was really long and throughout the video, I was just hoping it would end soon because my brain was legit starting to switch off after a while.

The video finally ends, the boss walks in a bit embarrassed at how long the video was and he starts asking me about my impression of the company, I told him I didn't expect the video to actually be 25 minutes long and he laughs it off, but then I told him I was interested to be part of the company because what they are offering is what I have been looking for for a while now, he then tells me that he wants to give me an assignment to gauge my skills, and it's as ridiculous as the length of his introduction video.

The assignment was to create a full design proposal based on a floorplan he will be giving me after the interview.  

He didn't specify exactly what the proposal needed, but he did tell me that I needed to prepare a space planning proposal and a mood board, to which I ask him if 3D rendering is required, and he sort of left it up to me, but then said something along the lines of...

"It's up to you, but we will gauge how desperate a candidate really wants the job based on their proposal."

... which translated to "if you don't prepare a 3D rendering, then we will assume you are not desperate enough to be considered for the position" and to be honest, I was itching to do some Interior Design related work, so I agreed to it, and I told him that I needed some time to do it, he was agreeable to it 

He sends me the floorplan the very night and I thought he would send me a simple floorplan like this....

not this...

... but nope, because this is a test, of course he had to send me this complicated multi angled floorplan...

... the lines may be straight, but almost every wall is at a different angle, it was such a pain. He then asked when we can meet for the second round, and after seeing the floorplan, I knew I needed some time, so I told him if we could meet on the first week of March and he agreed. 

I managed to do the AutoCAD out within 2 to 3 days, did a SketchUp of the empty apartment at work because it was pretty quiet in the store for the past few days, and then I get a message from the boss requesting to push the 2nd Interview forward due to scheduling conflicts as he wanted me to meet a few more people for the second round. I was a little bumped out about it because that meant I had 1 week short to complete the proposal, and I also had to take leave to accede to his timing, but I understand the timing issue, so I agreed to it and applied for leave. He felt quite bad about having to trouble me so much, but I figured it was a valid reason to take leave from work and I could enjoy my two days back to back off from work because the next day happened be my off day. 

Before the Interview, I will say, I was pretty proud of my proposal because I put in quite a bit of effort for it. I was expecting the boss and his group to be impressed by how much effort I had put into the proposal for the interview, so I went to the office feeling quite proud of myself.

I reach the office about a minute late, the boss invites me in and then informs me that unfortunately, only him and his co-founder will be attending the interview today because the other guys are not available... 

A part of me was relieved because I really didn't want to present to so many people, but another part of me also felt a bit cheated about it because I had agreed to this new date due to your request to meet the other team, and now half of them are not able to make it, which meant I had rushed out the proposal and wasted my leave for nothing.

Anyways, I start to set everything up in the meeting room for the 2 of them, and when I open my Proposal, I was sort of  hoping they would be impressed by the amount of work that had gone into it, the amount of renderings I did, but there wasn't any of that, the both of them just kinda stared pretty intensely at the screen, as if they were trying to spot issues they had with my proposal.

So I go through my proposal and I could sense throughout the presentation that the other co-founder was starting to get bored because at one point, he started looking at his phone instead of paying attention to what I was trying to present. Seeing him lose interest made me rush through the presentation even more because I just wanted to end the presentation as soon as possible lest he ends up dozing off.

The moment the presentation ended, that was when things kind of went south for me because it became critique time, it was like I was back in Poly

They really only highlighted the negative things about the presentation, I mean they were not mean or rude about it, it was generally really constructive feedback, but for the amount of work and effort I put into the project, it would have been nice to have some my hard work acknowledged.

It was quite a demoralizing experience to say the least. I went in all proud of my proposal and I left the office really second guessing myself a lot. I later found out that majority of their designers were given the exact same floorplan to play around with and they definitely came up with much more interesting layouts than the one I came up with, so that was definitely the wake up call that I needed. I mean I knew my designs were never super impressive, but to potentially be joining a new company and have the weakest design sense is a bit worrying for me.

It would be a good place to learn and grow as a designer, but I don't really know if the company would be a right fit for me because I came into the interview for the job not to join the company to learn, but to come in as an experience designer, so I'm not sure how I feel about that. I mean if this had been a company that I had followed on Instagram before, and am a huge fan of their work, then me joining the company to learn from the team is definitely something I wouldn't mind, but it's not, it's a company that reached out to me out the blue one day, a company that I have never heard of before that has a decent portfolio.

I think my ego would probably stop me from accepting the job offer if one was going to be made to me because I really am not feeling the company anymore, to be honest, even though what they are offering is what I am looking for, there is something with the company that I just don't really vibe with. 

Update :

An offer was made and I have requested for some time to think about it. Not sure how the boss will react to my request though. 

The very last Project

I am currently having some issues with my customer from my last remaining Interior Design Project. The project has been completed for a while now, my client and her husband moved into the space mid-renovation back in July and the space was officially fully livable by around the October period, unfortunately, due to my tiler's shoddy workmanship, there was an outstanding defect that I couldn't touch up until the beginning of January this year due to my tiler's manpower issue, so the client essentially waited for about 4 months for that particular issue to be resolved. 

The issue wasn't really an urgent matter because it didn't really affect my client and her husband too much, so she wasn't breathing down my neck the entire time while my tiler took his own sweet fucking time to set a date for me. That being said, I also didn't feel comfortable asking my client to settle the remaining payment while there was still a defect to be rectified, that's why I didn't handover the project officially.

My tiler, being the moron that he is, actually send a worker down at the end of last year to do the touch up works, but for some reason forgets to mention to his worker what exactly needed to be touched up, so his worker didn't bring the necessary equipment to the site and I ended up having to wait another 2 months before he was able to send another worker down again. 

My client was very patient throughout this whole fuck up. A worker was finally send down to rectify the issue earlier last month. I had to get my manager to settle the scheduling for me with the tiler because my tiler, upon learning that I no longer work at ID4, just didn't really care about prioritizing my project anymore, he's fucking horrible.

Anyways, once the issue was finally settled last month, I decided to give my client a few days before I reached out again to officially complete the handover, this meant getting her to pay the remaining payment and also sign a few documents. I mean she waited so many months for my tiler, the least I can do is extend the same level of courtesy she has given me. 

So I did and reached out to her about a week later. I told her to look out for an incoming SMS that will have the links to the e-documents I would need her to sign and also to settle the remaining payment.

Based on my past Whatsapp experience with her, she isn't the type that will reply immediately, but she will usually reply at the end of the day because I guess that is when she is actually free to look through non-work related messages.

Unfortunately for me, this time around, she didn't actually bother to reply within a day and I because I wanted to give her space like she did for me and not hound for the final payment, I just kept having faith that she will reply eventually, but then a week passes by and still no updates from her, 1 week is really fucking long so she has either missed out on the message or she is just not planning to reply, at first I assumed it was the former, so I send her a follow up text to check if she had received the SMS with the e-documents link, this time I gave her a day to reply to me, but then she never did and I realize it wasn't that she had missed out on the message, she clearly had no plans to reply, so I had no choice but to give her a call, a call that she never actually picked up.

At this point, I was started to get a bit worried because this was very out of character of her, for the past few months before the final round of touch up was done, she had been extremely patient and understanding, whenever there was any issue she had that was related to the renovations, she would always apologize for bothering me before sharing with me her issues because she knew I was no longer working as an ID, and I have always been happy to help because of how ridiculously thoughtful she was, she had even send me a text on New Year's thanking me for my help with her renovation and even invited me to her place for tea whenever I had the time, so it was honestly very odd that she would just ignore me all of a sudden after the last remaining touch up was done. 

Anyways, an hour after that failed call attempt, she finally replies me and informs me that she had missed out on my messages but will revert when she finds it.

Well, that was about a week ago and there has been zero updates from her since. I did send her a CNY Greeting 2 days back and I will be honest, it wasn't really me genuinely wishing her a Prosperous New Year, I was just testing to see of she would reply or not and whelp, she passed my test, and by pass my test I mean completely ignoring my messages, which made it pretty clear that her initial reason for not replying to me was because she "missed out my messages" was a fucking lie, you don't miss out my messages 3 times in a row because that was never an issue that you had prior to the New Year.

Maybe that is one of her New Year's Resolution. 

1. Missing Out on Text Messages.

And I guess her next one would be.

2. Default on Payment

I honestly don't know what happened between the last time I was actively messaging her and now. If she wanted me to waive the final amount, I would actually be willing to do that because of how much inconvenience my tiler has put her through, apparently his guys also clogged up her aircon pipe with cement and she had to get an aircon contractor to clear the chockage for her, a cost that she bore.

The delay happened because of my tiler's ineptitude, I honestly cannot believe I kept going back to him for all my past projects because 70% of the time, there will always be some sort of issue that arise from his shoddy workmanship.

Sigh, anyways, I am desperate to close this project soon, so if she doesn't respond within this month, I will probably just waive the $2500 and then beg her to sign the handover documents for me in March.