EAT!

It seems as though my posts lately always centers around experiences with twats, be it in the form of a F&b sales assistant or a disgruntled ambulance driver.


Today's post won't be any different.



There was no dinner at home today, so my sister and I decided to head over to the nearby mall to get our dinner. There were a few options to choose from but I wanted to have noodles for dinner, so we did and went to a noodle shop called EAT. The outlet we visited today had quite a few PRC workers, so conversations we had were all in mandarin.


I headed up to the counter when we reached the shop and the conversation between the guy at the counter and I went like this (translated to English)...


Counter Guy : What can I get for you?


Me : Ummmm...


*I look over to my sister who was still busy deciding on what she wanted and upon realizing I was waiting for her, she urges me to order first*


Me : Can I have a Fishball Bee Hoon & Fishball Kuay Teow. Takeaway!


*counter guy proceeds to enter my order into the machine and then goes*


Counter Guy: Eating here or takeaway?


Me : Takeaway. -never hurts to repeat myself I guess-


*Counter guy repeats what I just said, "Takeaway",  and looks up from the machine, waiting for my sister to make her order.*


Sister : I will have Laksa.


*Counter guy keys in order, ask the type of noodle she wants and then tells the cooks our orders*


Counter Guy : Would you like anything else? Drinks?


*we shake our head*


Counter Guy : Fried fritters?


*we shake our head again, paid up and headed to the side to wait for our orders to be prepared*


At this point, my sister notices the cooks were preparing 3 dishes that were similar to our order, but instead of being prepared in a takeaway container, they were served in a bowl and left on the counter, worried that the 3 bowls of noodles might be ours, she asks me if I had told the guy I wanted to takeaway and not dine-in. I told her I did and assumed the 3 bowls probably belonged to another group of customer.


About a minute later, one of the cook looks at the untouched bowls of noodles on the counter and goes...


Cook : Come and collect your noodles!


....just shouting it across the whole shop, I still thought that the order belonged to someone else, so I didn't respond, my sister was a bit worried and asked me again if I was sure I told the guy I wanted to takeaway, I responded I was sure. The counter guy then notices my sister and I standing at the corner and looks at us for a while before looking at the bowls of noodles, and then back at us again...


Counter Guy : You guys wanted to takeaway?


Sister and I : Yes. We ordered takeaway


Counter Guy : So you want to takeaway?


Sister : Yes! *firm tone*



And then the fucker decided to just stare at us, literally glaring at the both of us for probably 2 seconds in just pure annoyance mixed with a bit of disbelief. When he finally snapped back to reality, he demands an additional 60 cents from us for the takeaway fee and proceeds to grab each bowl of noodle to dump them into the takeaway container, making sure to glare at us again after he was done with each bowl.


I just looked at him, a bit taken aback that he was giving so much attitude. I mean it's not my fault the dude's so fucking incompetent at taking orders, he even repeated the word "takeaway" when I told him I wanted to "takeaway".

Me: “打包！”

Him: “打包。”

对，我要打fucking包，你这可蠢货。

I chose not to argue, and just half smiled at him because I really didn't want to argue in mandarin with a PRC, because that's just asking for trouble. My Chinese is pretty horrible as it is, and if I wanted to argue in English, I would rather insult him in front of his face without him understanding a word of what I said rather than have him scream...

"Fruck you! Fruck you!

...at me. This is a very trivial case of bad customer service and I'm sure there are many worst ones out there, but that glare he gave us when he realize HE fucked up made me want to take the bowl of Laksa and throw it at his face.

Ambulance Driver MuthaFucker

Whilst driving out to get lunch for the family today at Westgate, I decided to try a different route to reach my destination because driving the same route is boring, I wanted a change of scenery.


So as I was driving, I reached this cross junction where I could either go straight via the old route, or I could make a right turn and go the other route, since I was so bored of the old route for reasons unknown,  I decided go right, and that's where the problem started really.



As I made a right turn, instead of turning into the lane I was suppose to turn to, which is the middle lane, I decided to turn into the right lane, since the car that was next to me prior to the turn was making a U-Turn, I thought there should be enough time and space for my car to enter the right lane without causing any accident.



There was no accident, but what I had in exchange was a very disgruntled driver who kept honking at my car, which startled my sister who was along for the trip. I looked at my rear view mirror upon hearing the angry honks to see what had happened and I see an ambulance with the siren lights turned on. I thought he was alerting me to let him cut my lane because he had an emergency situation, so as I was preparing to slow down and let him overtake me, I then see the ambulance lane change to the middle lane, still honking as he drove past me, and at this point I could see the driver, and he was a very angry Indian man who was glaring at me as he drove past, that would have been fine, I might have gotten a bit upset but I deserve, seeing how I did not stick to my lane, but then what he did next was what really pissed me off.... he decided that giving me the stink eye wasn't a bad enough punishment for cutting his lane, he actually fucking flipped me off as he drove past me.



I was fucking pissed!



Should he honk at me ? Yes, he should because I should have stuck to my lane instead of cutting into his.


Did I know he was there? Obviously not, otherwise I wouldn't have cut into his lane, especially because it's an ambulance with the siren lights on.


Should he have given me the finger? All I did was just cut his lane, and it wasn't as if I had done it on purpose to spite him, I did not curse at him and or tell his mother to go fuck herself, so No! it doesn't warrant a finger.


He finally stops at a red light and as I was still feeling really riled up from that middle finger, I decided to stop my car right fucking next to him. He notices my car and he decides to take a proper look at me, or glare at me, I did not feel any sort of intimidation because the guy is probably well into his late 40s to early 50s, all he looked like to me was an angry old Indian man. What is he going to do? Exit from his vehicle and try to start a fight with me? I knew he wasn't going to get physical so I returned the favor and glared right back at him.



I was talking smack about him to my sister, and I made sure he knew I was talking smack about him because I was staring at him as I was doing so... he then proceeds to inch his ambulance forward a little and try to read my number plate, which is fucking stupid because what is he going to do with my number plate, go to a police station to report me for cutting his lane?

Fuck off. And he did, the moment the light turn green, he sped off, to save the poor soul who probably lost his life because the ambulance took too long to reach. Ain't nobody got time to get physical when there's a life at stack.

That being said, the ambulance isn't a big one, so the accident he's probably driving towards might probably be as severe as a paper cut. 

"Ah I cut my finger accidentally with this piece of paper!"

"Not to worry, Muthu is here to save the day with my small ass ambulance!"

"It's fine Muthu, I just need a plaster."

"Muthu will go get plaster from the closest Watsons. Muthu away!"

*drives sorry ass ambulance to nearby Watsons and gets cheap ass plasters because Muthu ain't about the rich lifestyle*

"Sorry Muthu is late, Muthu got lane cut by some Chinese on the road just now. Chinese learn lesson because Muthu give him middle finger. No one messes with Muthu and gets away with it."

"Its fine Muthu, I got a plaster at home. It's all patched up. You can go home now."

"Muthu has failed! Muthu will commit seppuku!"

....but Muthu was unable to commit seppuku because Muthu couldn't afford a Tanto and PaperCut patient didn't want to offer her kitchen knife because she didn't want to clean human innards off the floor of her living room.

Bad Customer Service Rant

I had decided that since today was such a hot day, I would take a drive down to Holland Village to get a cold drink from Boost and then head to Plain Vanilla Bakery to get some cupcakes since I was going to be there. 

The moment I saw Boost, I was actually really happy that there wasn't any customers, that meant minimal waiting time for my drinks, so as I walked up to the shop, I notice there were 2 girls who were on shift, a Malay girl, who was fiddling with her phone whilst stuffing chips into her mouth and a Eurasian girl, who was busying preparing a few orders , for who I'm not sure because there was literally no other customer except me, maybe she was making for customers who would be returning shortly, maybe she was experimenting with new flavors, but either way, I was sure she was not going to be the one serving me since she was legitimately busy.

At this point, I assumed the girl who was stuffing chips into her mouth would stop what she was doing and greet me, I mean even if she wasn't looking at my direction, her peripheral vision should be able to see me standing at the counter, so I just stood there and waited for maybe 5 seconds under the assumption that she would actually start doing her job, because if a person stands at the counter for more than 5 seconds without moving, they are probably there to actually buy something and not admire the menu. She doesn't seem to be aware that I was there or just didn't really care because she continued doing whatever the fuck she was doing, playing with her phone and stuffing chips into her mouth. I had to call out to her 3 times before she finally responded. 

When she finally walks over, I greeted her and she smiled for as long as it takes for a person to say Hi, literally half a second and that friendly face morphed into this unfriendly "fuck you for interrupting my chip stuffing ritual" look, like she suddenly realize she had just seen the person who ran her fucking dog over, me being the one who ran her imaginary dog over.

For the next few seconds when she was taking my order, her tone was just plain rude and condescending, when she asked if I wanted Original size, she sounded as if she was really telling me...

"Of course you want Original, pfft! I would roll my eyes if I could, but I can't because I need this job to be able to satiate my need for my potato chips. One day I will open my own potato chip factory and just make potato chips for myself forever"

And really, for the entire process of making the drink itself, I wouldn't expect her to look friendly, there's a level to how ridiculously friendly I want the service personnel to be and the requirement to look like she's enjoying her job as she's preparing my drink is not necessary, but she didn't look happy.

When she finally completes the order, I thought she would at least smile when she hands me my drinks, but NOPE! She passes it to me with that same exact look on her face. The "why the fuck am I serving this person when I can be so much more" look. So I just took my drink and went to withdraw money from the nearby ATM, feeling quite unhappy with the service I had received. 

When I looked back at the store again as I was queuing up at the ATM, she had apparently forgone her "Chip Stuffing Ritual to look as close to a hamster as possible" and was instead busy talking to the Eurasian girl, probably gossiping about the new Potato Chips Cold Storage would be selling and giving the Eurasian girl tips on how to really stuff as much potato chips in your mouth without damaging it, which would be ironic seeing how her mouth has obviously been damaged, that why she couldn't even smile for more than half a second. 

Then I got Plain Vanilla Cupcakes and well, I have nothing to complain about their service. It was alright, compared to the Boost chick, it was more than alright.


* I went back to Boost a few days later and got another drink, this time the server was different, she was not as unpleasant, but honestly, when you want your customers to "go to the left" so they don't obstruct the queue after they made their order, maybe don't say it in a commanding tone. I felt like I was a recruit back in BMT being ordered by my sergeant to keep right or he will ask me to knock it down.


Lesson learnt, being a polite customer to any Boost employee in the future is unnecessary. Unless they are able to greet me like a proper server should, I'm just going to remain generally unfriendly and unapproachable.


"I want my juice, so make me my fucking juice." *throws $10 bills in her face* "Boost me up! Bitch! And don't you go throwing your nose shit into the blender because I'm watching you."